Listen! A Gift Received, A Gift Given

Everyone and every thing exists to be acknowledged, seen, and heard.

"The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes, but in having new eyes."  ~Marcel Proust

I would add to Proust's words, we must 'have new ears', too.

Thus, on an early Spring walk, while crossing a busy boulevard, I was saddened to see a large roadrunner had been killed by a vehicle. It's form was intact, a deflated silhouette. I moved quickly on to avoid a similar fate. Later that afternoon, while sitting on my patio, an unusual visitor lit onto a nearby chimney top. It was a roadrunner, smaller, perhaps a female.

Greater Roadrunner
Photo used with permission: kenneturner.com

This is a bird that "prefers sprinting to flying", electing flight primarily to enter and exit its elevated nest or escape a predator. My rooftop sighting was very unusual. As I watched, the bird began calling-- a "sharp barking" that broadcast out in the direction of the lethal boulevard. While the Cornell Ornithology Lab notes this call is used near the nest site, I suddenly knew that it was calling to its missing mate. Roadrunners mate for life--a span of 7 to 8 years. The calling and visual scanning went on for a few minutes. How do creatures know when their mate or clan member is gone for good? They must just carry on with the tasks of living.

Being present

Perhaps some readers are howling about my anthropomorphising (giving human qualities to non-humans,) and I won't go into my beliefs, here and now. My heart was touched and, for the purpose of this blog post, I want to illustrate how important it is to be a listener.

Author image

“Listening is about being present, not just about being quiet,”reminds journalist Krista Tippett. As the listener, I was suffused with sympathy for the roadrunner calling from the roof. As you encounter another person's tragedy or sadness, be present, listen.

Start a healing conversation

In my post, Was it a Peaceful Death? Opening the Door to Healing Conversation, I coached the value of not shying away from an encounter with a grieving person. I encouraged questions such as:

• I was sorry to hear about _____. 
• How are you today? 
• Was it a peaceful death? 
• What memory of him/her are you holding close right now?
• What memory makes you smile? 

I am not suggesting you conduct an interview! One question can open up an opportunity to listen. Are you sensing that another question is useful at this moment? My intuition launched the story of these birds. You can explore the power of listening to your gut feelings here: The Physics of Intuitive Compassion: Albert Einstein had it right!

If listening to one response is enough, simply say: 

Thank you for telling me; take care of yourself.

There is always something to hear...someone, some thing grateful to be heard

Listen!

The gravel verge bears a walker:

I hear chewing of shredded wheat.

Listen!

Birds call from dawn to sundown:

tedious mourning dove blues, 

cactus wren's grinding starter,

darting quail high notes: Uh-huh-Uh-huh,

Hey-you! alert - the thrasher arrives.

Listen!

Our homes hum tones tiny to tremendous; 

stretched and still in darkness,

I seek their source, finding some

in the pestling of brain, bones, molars.

Listen!

Attending too, to unfulfilled utterances:

hesitations, head dips, hand flutters,

the staccato of unsettled eyes and breath:

these voiceless notes of soul speak

of love or loss or the deep water strokes

of living without answers. 

Listen!

+++

Listen! (c)2020 Deborah Chappa

Thank you for caring!