Put Your Heart In Everything You Do

Author's Prickly Pear

My spirit has a radar for hearts; I see hearts in many, many places. I've been scoffed at as silly, excitedly stopping on a trail to absorb its message or take a photo, but I know. The heart is powerful. It is meant to be seen, shared, experienced. Are you experiencing your heart, fully?

Fully in my Why and my Now

Scottish theologian, William Barclay noted: 

"There are two great days in a person's life-- the day we are born and the day we discover why."

For me, volunteering is my 'why' and a significant portal to heart experiences. Now retired, I bring whatever experience I can to whatever setting I choose to serve. Speaking with a friend about some of my volunteering, she surprised me, remarking, 'it sounds like you're overqualified.' To me, that term belongs in the employment arena, not while seeking a volunteer niche. Truthfully, I want to pour out my whole self--skills, awareness, and heart-- into everything I do. There is no limit, no measuring out and holding some in reserve. All I have is now, perhaps this complete 24 hour day, but most assuredly, this now-time. 

"'Now' is the closest approximation in time to the experience of eternity." - Alan Cohen

Do you remember that expression, "live like there's no tomorrow"? That's the secret to peace. It's the secret before last breaths are drawn and it opens an indescribably wonderful 'place.' So, every breath of now can open up to that place, if you give your all, your heart. 

Heart rocks, Tohono O'odham basket
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Today, with the exception of vegetative hearts like the prickly pear, I saw the largest heart rock, ever, at least 8 inches tall. At my excitement, my hiking partner remarked, "well, you have a big heart."

Growing Awareness and Grief Awareness

Growing in awareness is like nurturing a super power but it's not as complex as the plot of Marvel Comics' X-Men movie, where futuristic mutations give some humans extraordinary skills! Similar to the Coach's posts about the power of intuition, you must patiently access and practice:

1. presence
2. listening  
3. sensitivity 

You must also avoid judgement and giving advice! The super power of awareness allows you to support a grieving person, simply. Click on the skills links above and you will understand how what a grieving person most needs is understanding. Yes, Western culture has hammered away about productivity, and 'making yourself useful' but your super power as grief aware will be boundless when you works on these steps. Your heart will pour out like a balm with surprising results. As for those 'results', please don't seek them like feel-good candy. Trust that there are occurring because that is the nature of all heart investment!

Thank you for caring!

Listen! A Gift Received, A Gift Given

Everyone and every thing exists to be acknowledged, seen, and heard.

"The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes, but in having new eyes."  ~Marcel Proust

I would add to Proust's words, we must 'have new ears', too.

Thus, on an early Spring walk, while crossing a busy boulevard, I was saddened to see a large roadrunner had been killed by a vehicle. It's form was intact, a deflated silhouette. I moved quickly on to avoid a similar fate. Later that afternoon, while sitting on my patio, an unusual visitor lit onto a nearby chimney top. It was a roadrunner, smaller, perhaps a female.

Greater Roadrunner
Photo used with permission: kenneturner.com

This is a bird that "prefers sprinting to flying", electing flight primarily to enter and exit its elevated nest or escape a predator. My rooftop sighting was very unusual. As I watched, the bird began calling-- a "sharp barking" that broadcast out in the direction of the lethal boulevard. While the Cornell Ornithology Lab notes this call is used near the nest site, I suddenly knew that it was calling to its missing mate. Roadrunners mate for life--a span of 7 to 8 years. The calling and visual scanning went on for a few minutes. How do creatures know when their mate or clan member is gone for good? They must just carry on with the tasks of living.

Being present

Perhaps some readers are howling about my anthropomorphising (giving human qualities to non-humans,) and I won't go into my beliefs, here and now. My heart was touched and, for the purpose of this blog post, I want to illustrate how important it is to be a listener.

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“Listening is about being present, not just about being quiet,”reminds journalist Krista Tippett. As the listener, I was suffused with sympathy for the roadrunner calling from the roof. As you encounter another person's tragedy or sadness, be present, listen.

Start a healing conversation

In my post, Was it a Peaceful Death? Opening the Door to Healing Conversation, I coached the value of not shying away from an encounter with a grieving person. I encouraged questions such as:

• I was sorry to hear about _____. 
• How are you today? 
• Was it a peaceful death? 
• What memory of him/her are you holding close right now?
• What memory makes you smile? 

I am not suggesting you conduct an interview! One question can open up an opportunity to listen. Are you sensing that another question is useful at this moment? My intuition launched the story of these birds. You can explore the power of listening to your gut feelings here: The Physics of Intuitive Compassion: Albert Einstein had it right!

If listening to one response is enough, simply say: 

Thank you for telling me; take care of yourself.

There is always something to hear...someone, some thing grateful to be heard

Listen!

The gravel verge bears a walker:

I hear chewing of shredded wheat.

Listen!

Birds call from dawn to sundown:

tedious mourning dove blues, 

cactus wren's grinding starter,

darting quail high notes: Uh-huh-Uh-huh,

Hey-you! alert - the thrasher arrives.

Listen!

Our homes hum tones tiny to tremendous; 

stretched and still in darkness,

I seek their source, finding some

in the pestling of brain, bones, molars.

Listen!

Attending too, to unfulfilled utterances:

hesitations, head dips, hand flutters,

the staccato of unsettled eyes and breath:

these voiceless notes of soul speak

of love or loss or the deep water strokes

of living without answers. 

Listen!

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Listen! (c)2020 Deborah Chappa

Thank you for caring!

The Physics of Intuitive Compassion: Albert Einstein had it right!

I never thought I'd have much in common with a physicist. 

Aren't their brains wired for deep dives into time, space, and matter? For most people, time is a digital display pushing us to the next task; space is a gap in clutter; and matter is about our 'stuff.'

After reading this quote, I wanted to know more about the goofy-haired mathematician who's name has become synonymous with genius:

"The intuitive mind is a sacred gift and the rational mind is a faithful servant. We have created a society that honors the servant and has forgotten the gift."

[Author, Bob Samples interpreted Albert Einstein's regard for qualities of higher consciousness in his 1976 book, "The Metaphoric Mind: A Celebration of Creative Consciousness.”]

Does everyone have intuition?

Yes, but engaging it is like using different muscles to talk or sing.  If you rarely sing (or have been told you can't!) you may feel awkward or incapable. Einstein said: "It’s not that I’m so smart, it’s just that I stay with problems longer." [Source]  Intuition requires that you stay with the issue! Take a gentle, deep breath and tune into an inner voice or prompt. If you can, be quiet and still for a few moments and ponder a person or situation; you may feel:

• a flutter in your heart
• a sense of calm--or--excitement--or danger
• a sense of being pulled forward--or--pushed back
• a muting of voice or stilling of reaction

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It's been called listening to your heart, a gut feeling, instinct, divine guidance. Albert Einstein suggested it is a sacred gift. He also described it as a powerful, personal tool. 

"Intuition is the father of new knowledge...Intuition, not intellect, is the ‘open sesame’ of yourself." [Source]

Are there benefits to honoring and engaging the intuitive mind?

Absolutely. Intuition can save your life, steer your life, and deepen your experience of life. I've enjoyed all of these. It takes practice...it is a practice in the true sense of the word. You can strengthen your reception like wiggling a television antennae. Professor Einstein reminded us, "Not everything that can be counted counts, and not everything that counts can be counted." [Source] It's okay if you used to think of intuition as woo-woo nonsense or a carnival act; new awareness is part of the fun of living. 

As a young student, Albert Einstein came to a liberating insight about honoring and engaging a higher knowing:

Albert Einstein, age 14 [Source]

"The basic laws of the universe are simple, but because our senses are limited, we can’t grasp them. [emphasis mine] There is a pattern in creation. If we look at this tree outside whose roots search beneath the pavement for water, or a flower which sends its sweet smell to the pollinating bees, or even our own selves and the inner forces that drive us to act, we can see that we all dance to a mysterious tune, [emphasis mine] and the piper who plays this melody from an inscrutable distance—whatever name we give him—Creative Force, or God—escapes all book knowledge."  [Source]

What is intuitive compassion and how can it help with condolences?

The Condolence Coach has addressed compassion in other posts; in fact, search my keywords "labels" list and you'll find nearly fifty references. Think of  intuitive compassion as allowing your inner tree roots to seek out pools of sensitivity. You can go beyond the obvious "I'm sorry, we'll all miss her" and share unique observations and impressions. Spend time with your intuition, browse my posts and build your skills. You might start with Compassion and Condolence: Finding the Words to Walk Together.

Thank you for caring!